A little over twelve years ago, I found my myself wide awake alone in the middle of the dark night, surrounded by unfamiliar smells and noises, feeling very unsure of myself. Laying in a hospital bed, I was waiting for the nurse to arrive with my brand new daughter who would be hungry and ready to be nursed by me for the first time. Initially relieved that she was perfectly healthy, I was exhausted from nine months of worry and a whole day of labour. But the most predominant feeling at that moment was dreaded fear. I was so afraid that I wouldn't be capable of providing for her. Sure, I had read all the books. I knew the techniques. But, was I really up for the challenge?
When I heard the bassinet being pushed down the hallway, my pulse quickened. The reality of the situation stark. The door opened quietly. My daughter was wheeled into my room. What to do? Could I do this?
But, when the nurse lifted her out of the bassinet, I felt like I saw her for the first time. Freshly bathed, she was wrapped tightly like a cocoon with a soft blanket tucked around her. Her wisps of hair combed back; her tiny perfect pink face aglow. And when I saw her pursed lips searching for sustenance, I felt my heart soften in a warm melt. I had fallen in love.
I never knew what a "melting hearting" meant until then. And, I knew that I would never forget that moment when my daughter was placed in my arms, where she would remain as we began our life together......always within arms reach.
Happy Valentine's Day, to my daughter, who is even more of a romantic than I am. No matter where your life path will lead, you will always be within arms reach.
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