Friday, August 13, 2010

nectar from a scented candle.



This morning, I watched a nervous hummingbird with thrumming wings hover over a group of scented candles sitting on the table beside me.  It dipped and swooped....it's beak ready to sip nectar like it would get from a flower.  Stumped over this dilemma, it lifted its green irridescent body up, zipped it around with its flurry wings only to find a set of windows that reflected the greenery of the tree close by.  

Before it touched the glass in an attempt to fly right into this illusion, the hummingbird realized it was not as it seemed.  So, it returned once again to the candles in one last attempt to seek out the nectar.  Finally, it zippity split in zigzag flight until it was swooped up by the morning breeze in hopes of finding true sweetness.

And all I could think of was how often we humans follow a similar path.  Entranced by the enticing pander of life's nectar, our sensibilities abandoned, we choose to seek out sweetness from an illusion.   From deception to false impressions, sometimes its very difficult to ascertain who and what in our life is the real deal. 

A few minutes later, I heard the familiar call of the Cardinal.  My eyes followed its courting sound until they alighted on this lonely but proud red bird perched on the tiptop branches of a bare tree.  He sang his whistling tweet sending it out to the yard and then would pause in silence hoping for a reply.  After a few rounds of calling out his desires, a female arrived, her feathers dressed in earthy tones.  She replied in her own way, while skipjumping the branches of the same tree, flirting as she went.  The male red lifted up off the top branch to begin his mating pursuit.  And as they flightdance from one branch to another, their songchirps pulled them together until they took flight , off towards the river.  

And all I could think of was how often humans follow a similar path when it comes to courting another.  The c'mon chirps, small talk melodies and a fllirting chase that eventually leads to a meeting up close and flying off together to seek out a place to express their physical and emotional desires to one another..... hoping its the real thing and not an illusion.  

Today, I saw two mourning doves.  In love.  Mated for life.  That is their lot in life.... their commitment wrapped up in nature's rules. I wonder if some of their couplings are not the best.  Do you think mourning doves bicker with one another after a few years of marriage bliss?  Do they wander away from life partners like many humans do or do they remain loyal to their commitment, through sickness and in health, through all the difficult times to reach more joyous times again?  I wonder.

Tonight, I poured myself a glass of wine, put on my nightgown, grabbed a blanket and put on a Mark Knopfler CD.... You might get lucky now and then, You might get luck and then some...... his light touch melody playing in the background.  I went back outside, tucked myself under the blanket.  Music playing, wine to sip on, and darkness all around me.  I wanted no natural light to alter the view of the stars tonight.  They were calling for a meteor shower.  I wanted a front row seat to take in the show..........

As the skies grew darker, deepening in midnight blue, the stars revealed themselves with abundance.  Some were faint glows.  Some formed various astronomical symbols.  Some stood out with their close brightness.  Satellites and planes flickered  through the big dipper as they moved across the night sky.  I waited.......... and waited...... enjoying the moment of being alone at peace, inhaling the cool August air, listening to the stories of Knopfler and the beat of his Celtic ways.  

A shooting star whizzed by in a blink......... its tail lingering longer  like a wisp of knowing.  Another and another made their presence known and then disappeared back into the black sky fold.  

And it made me wonder if shooting stars eventually reincarnate into fireflies.  It made me wonder what I was looking at.  Are the stars an illusion?  Their timeline is very different than ours. What we see from our vantage point are the remants of what a star once was.  We are surrounded by illusionary lights flickering amongst the wandering clouds..... 

It also made me wonder if some humans are like shooting stars.... they have exuded their energy in one big display of beauty and then disappear only to return in a new form of who they are.  Humbled, vulnerable....ready to be real.


  • nectar from scented candles.
  • looking at a window and getting pulled in by the reflection rather than the solidity of reality
  • sending out matng calls and hoping for the best results.  But at least theirs a concerted effort at this point.  For the cardinal couple?  I hope they are nesting somewhere happy, happy.
  • The mourning doves?  May they be in their home settled caring for one another.
  • shooting stars scattering across the night sky.......

As for the stars?   I hung a few wishes on the tails of the shooting stars.  Good yearning wishes.  And I tagged on a few messages to the people out there in other countries, across my country whom I know and love.... 

May the stars not all be illusions.  May some of them reach down into our timeframe to allow us to have our wishes granted and our messages passed on.

ps.  Just so you know that you have received it, My messages to you ? 

I am here. My light is always on.  You are always welcome in my home.  Most importantly, ...... May you always know that you are loved as you are always.   You are a gift from God.  Like the hummingbird.  Like the Cardinals.  Like the Mourning Doves, Like the stars above. 

Loved as we are always.  We all are. THAT for sure is not an illusion. 

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is truly beautiful, Dana. We humans follow a very similar path to nature - we just don't always realise it. In many ways all of the species on the earth are connected by shared experiences.

I am thrilled you have hummingbirds in your garden. I have never seen one for real. They appear to come from the land of faery - such delicate creatures.

You sound like you are writing from a place of serenity. I am glad XX

CorvusCorax12 said...

great sentiments...nature is a wondrous thing and we can learn a lot if we sit still enough to observe

awareness said...

Thank you Selma. I'm in a place of calm right now, though it waxes and wanes. I'm trying my best to take the time to breathe, to meditate...to feel the noise leave me so I can experience contented silence.
I have a plethora of hummingbirds this year. They are so fascinating to watch. I couldn't believe how close this little buzzer hovered by and for how long. Of course I didn't have my camera with me.

Twain....you sure can! It was a pleasure to have the time to do just that yesterday morning. It was such a gorgeous day, as is today. I'm hoping to take in much of the outdoors today and this evening in between work. :) Tonight, I'm going kayaking up by Woolastook! Can't wait.

Anonymous said...

I struggle with the nature of paths. Is a path "correct" if it has a substantial downside? Are sacrifices unavoidable? If so, why? Should we strive for the perfect path?

awareness said...

I don't know about you, but my path leads me into the woods where there are big tree roots bulging out of the ground and mucky puddles that havent dried up from the last rain. My path is up and down hilly and curves around bends so I can't see what's ahead of me sometimes. Sometimes, there are large tree branches lying across my path that have been ripped from their home because of heavy winds and lightening strikes. But every now and then, there are these beautiful signposts welcoming me with new insight and learning. And sometimes, there are people standing on the side of my path just waiting to put their hand out to take mine, and we go along for the journey together for a while.

Heaven help us if our paths are perfect and free of challenges, even the big whopping sacrifice challenges.

I think I have a blog post here.... thank you Jason. I will put some more thought into it and post something more formally. You know, I would love to meet you one day. I thoroughly enjoy how your brain ticks. :)