Saturday, August 14, 2010

whys....



I was born to ask why.
big heaping sighing whys
wondrous eye widening whys....
thunderous cloud clapping whys
contemplative reveries
I was born that way.
it's who i am.... don't know why.
I gave birth to two babes who were born to ask why
sky blue toddler whys
childhood crave-seeking whys 
adolescent angst ridden whys
they were born that way....
it's who they are..... don't know why.

open ended seekers we are
my little brood and I.....we're "whys-crackers!"
one more quiet in her asking than the other
he's got brain heated tempered whys....
she's got whispering late night sighs....
and me?
ah, I've been blessed.....
I have whispering heated massive whys
percolating my soul
popping out of my pores
piercing the skies with spirit.
always spirit.....
my whys are my passion....my spirit, my flesh
firefly whys that blink light
like twinkling eyes.

Tonight....just to sample a few.....
why do some songs make me weep?
why do some bring peaceful sleep?
why does it hurt so much to love
why IS their no answer from above?
why do the Blues make my body want to dance?
why do I continue to give love a chance?
why does God leave me unprotected?
why can't my skin be more reflective?

there are no answers to assuage me....
except a bonding faith I cannot see.

I take a chance when I ask my questions.
rarely do answers echo back
its the natural fire deep within me 
to go beyond the "just because..."
just because
just because.....it never could settle me.

when i want to 
i can surrender
letting the whys just slip into mystery
letting go of the entanglement. 
when I want to embrace destiny.

But.....
Like my kids, I was born to ask why
big heaping sighing whys
wondrous eye widening whys
thunderous cloud clapping whys. 
I don't know why.  
just because.......
We were just born that way? 

So, tonight, I sit outside in silent darkness
catching breezes as they speak
imagining the voyage of discovery
when an answer lands at my feet.

Now, why would I want that to happen?
How crazy would that be??
Life is so much more enticing
when it's cradled in why-full mystery.


3 comments:

Marja said...

beautifully written. It is always rewarding to read your posts again. I don't know why. So many questions so less answers. I believe though that everything is there for a reason. a reason we don't always understand.
Arohanui Marja

Tell Me Why? said...

very touchy :) like ur post :)

awareness said...

Marja...me too. And it is when I can reach that "piece of mind" I let go of the whys and smile.

Tell me Why...welcome! I just checked out your blog. You have assimilated several answers to questions my son frequently asks....I'll show him your blog. Please come visit anytime.