Friday, June 22, 2007

just wondering............

do flowers emote?

validating our emotions,


recognizing them as they are,

where they came from,

what they represent

and how they make us feel

fills the spaces between us

with softspoken kinship .

how we feel is not who we are.

what we are feeling is not who we are.

sharing how we feel


validates our commonalities,

and allows us to seek a deeper understanding of who we are.

our emotions are not who we are,

but perhaps they are the language needed to unlock

the mysteries of the word of God.

confessions.....leading to the spaces between us.

perhaps pain and fear and anguish have an underlying reason for burdening our minds and hearts. Could it be that these deep wounds we carry may somehow direct us to unravelling a good mystery?

Can we take the risk to fill the empty spaces between us with how we really feel?

The biggest secrets we withhold are nestled in the folds of our emotions.

Perhaps that's why we hesitate to share them.

We have learned to keep secrets too well for fear of being rejected.

We have learned not to trust that we will be accepted unconditionally

despite how we feel.

just wondering about this tonight..............i guess you could say i'm feeling a wee bit curious and wary as to whether or not i should share some secrets?

****for more secrets check out sunday scribblings........


megnificent! said...

Yes, I feel the same way about being hesitant to share too much. Afraid of judgement, perhaps. But in a way, this blog is one of my secrets:-)
I enjoyed your thoughts.

Angel Without Wings said...

I have always been extremely open and honest on my blog. As a matter of fact I revealed things about myself last month that I have never really shared with anyone in my real life. I thought I would be buried under an onslaught of disapproval and disgust but nothing could have been further from the truth.

If you have a minute check it out:

I was recently badly burned by a friend who I loved very much. He betrayed my trust and used me for his own ends so now I feel the need to reconsider my openness.

Eventually I will probably find my way back to who I really am. I hope so because if you can't be yourself on your own blog, where can you be?

Rob Kistner said...

Hi Awareness - I really enjoyed the introspection of your post here. It opens many interesting questions, and sparked some thoughts on my part. I’ll try to capture them here, with your indulgence.

After 60 years of a full and varied (not always stellar) life, I have come to believe that keeping some secrets to one's self is the only responsible, compassionate way we can live.

If there is a big secret we are harboring, that truly hurts NO other 'innocent' person, and we need to let it out to find our peace and sanity -- then by all means, unload fully.

But, revealing secrets that may hurt, or even scar some 'innocent' other person, just to unburden ourselves, is, I strongly believe -- a very selfish, thoughtless, and uncaring act.

We all have done things we regret, and they may even be something deeply unsettling. But if the revealing would hurt someone else who is truly an 'innocent' third party, then we must buck up, bite down -- and keep it to ourselves.

It may eat us up inside, but guess what -- that is our punishment. Hurting someone else, who clearly does not deserve it, by dumping to relieve our personal anguish -- is both cruel and cowardly.

We don't live in a vacuum. The world does not revolve around us. We can't crush 'innocent' others just so we can feel better.

My poem for this Sunday Scribbling is entitled “Nocturne”. It touches on this burden of keeping secrets that would victimize the innocent. It's a very heavy load, but it's ours alone to carry -- and seek a private forgiveness that won't hurt, or worse yet, scar others.

Awareness said...

hey meg.....glad you could relate.

hi angel....yes i too have been burned in the past, but the singe feelings do go away in time I've found. we do open ourselves up when we wear our emotions too brightly, and it can hurt deeply when we are taken advantage of. i guess the key is to learn whom you can trust.

I will check out your post. thanks for the link. all means....always share. I enjoyed reading your thoughts and agree wholeheartedly. nothing is more mean than hurting others to feel better about or unburdening ourselves....what a selfish act. And, you're so right.....the world certainly doesn't revolve around us. we are specks in the big pic.....if we want to learn to live together on the same level playing field, we must be cognizant of other's feelings and life situations.

one of the main thoughts i had when writing this piece focused on confessional and also on sharing our secrets with God. By be open to validating our own them a name, and by sharing our thoughts along with them, maybe through prayer or confession can we seek to learn more of the mystery of God....if we trust ourselves to share our secrets with Him, and maybe this is more pronounced when we are feeling the most devastating feelings (pain, angst, sorrow, grief etc)

Or, I could be absolutely and completely full of shit. Who knows? It was fun to write and to think about......and I kind of think i'm onto least it's fun to consider it.

Anna said...

Such a pretty shot here! Have a great weekend!

Awareness said...

thank you Anna. The pansies live in my garden.

gautami tripathy said...

"...validates our commonalities,

and allows us to seek a deeper understanding of who we are.

our emotions are not who we are,

but perhaps they are the language needed to unlock

the mysteries of the word of God..."

Those above line made an impact. One great post!

Regina Clare Jane said...

There are secrets- and then there are secrets...
A wonderful thoughtful post as always- I have much to think about today.
Some secrets are better aired out, some better left in the dark- there are so many variables with secrets...

paris parfait said...

A beautiful, thoughtful post. I think many secrets can be shared; others, sadly must remain secret to protect others - or even ourselves. Not everyone can accept the truth; some people would prefer not to know. The trick is to share secrets with a non-judgmental friend. :) xo

Awareness said...

thank you gautami. I'm glad you could relate to what i have written. it always thrills me to know how much we humans have in makes our world truly feel like a village.

hi regina....there are a lot of variables, arent they?'re right. truth can be scary and ugly can't it? eeek!! It can also be transforming too....because if we put words to can mean all the difference. :)

Patois said...

Very thought-provoking, your words. I know many who have learned too well how to keep secrets because of that fear of rejection. I suppose we all learn it.