Patience is the companion of wisdom
It feels like it has been more than two days since my new blog, Grace Notes made it's debut. Yesterday morning, I found myself feeling like I had entered a road race with a bunch of bloggers I didn't even know, let alone know their personal motivations. Why? It seemed like the new site where Grace Notes dwells is set up to highlight bloggers who post furiously often and the ones who will be posting a couple of pieces a week may not be highlighted as respectfully. When I realized how it was all set up, I could feel my pulse rise and my competitive nature kick in. The road race seem inevitable.
I fretted over this. My intention is to highlight my writing, some of which I have written over the course of these past two years. I had no intentions of setting up another site to double my writing, and I sure as hell am not ready to leave this place. Back and forth I went onto the site trying to figure out the bigger picture of this new adventure I had found myself a part of.....and my blood pressure kept rising.......I was feeling full of electricity.......all zippy.....and I didn't like it.
Then, I began to step out of the road race mentality, which really does go against my nature and transported myself back to the beginning of setting up this blog. I am not a patient person by nature. So, when I began writing again and felt this relatively unusual calm found when patience enters the atmosphere, I realized that I would simply allow the topics and the process of the journey lead me. I had no clear idea of a destination........and for the most part, I still don't though it's plain to see the obvious themes of my writing and hence the path I found myself on. I wanted to feel that way again.
I jumped out of the road race.
One of my personal goals is to make something out of my writing. This desire has continued to increase as I have found my confidence again. Consequently, my goal for pursuing a more public blogsite was very different than when I began this Awareness site. Then, it was to archive my ideas. For the most part, I write unedited. What you read is first draft attempts........I have taken the advice I received at the start of my writing..........just write, edit later........ Now, I am beginning to review some of the pieces I have posted here. I have begun to edit them and will feed the other site with newer tighter written versions. I will write some new material, but it's time to hone and tone and possibly send it out more publicly.......
So, the desire to have my pieces read was fueling my feeling of frenzy. Can't let that happen. Need to remain patient. Need to stay the course, whatever course it is I'm on. I don't know whether patience is the only companion of wisdom, but you know what? I think they do make a good couple.
One step at a time.........finding my way
My hand in His.