Thursday, February 04, 2010

the hills are alive.........

river valley hill, view from the end of my street

One of the most important pieces of advice I was offered was to "pick the hills you fight over."  In other words, assess, reassess, step back to observe the issue from a different perspective, and try to foresee the benefits and dangers of your actions.  It's all about risk assessment and management.  The worst thing one can do is to blindly react from full feelings.  It only gets messy.  The key is to avoid the emotional bursting of the seams by lowering the blood pressure so you can think straight! That way, you have a much clearer picture of cause and effect...........

Ask yourself.....

Why is this important to me? 
Is this an issue that clashes with my heartheld values?
Is this worth my time, effort, energy? Why?  Why not?
If I don't fight for this hill, will there be long term reverberations that may impact future challenges?
Who does it impact if I don't take it on? 
Who does it impact if I do take it on?
If all of my actions are my best attempt at fulfilling one of 5 needs, Survival, Love and Belonging, Empowerment/Control, Freedom, Fun.......... which one is driving me? 
Its important to try to see it from the other side too?  What "need" is the person whom I am in conflict with trying to fulfill? Why do they want this particular hill?  Why is it important to them?

Sometimes, just by taking the time to consider whether it really is a hill you want to fight over or not, you may find a sense of resolution.  Other times, you hone your intent so you can tackle the issue with a more solid gameplan.  Though it doesn't guarantee success if you do decide to take on the battle, it does fill you with more conviction and confidence to take the risk.  

My terrain is hilly at the moment. Oh, who am I kidding?  My terrain is always frigging hilly. Whose isn't?  But honestly a few of the mounds ahead of me seemed to have erupted out of nowhere.  Sniper hills! Those types are probably the ones that are the most challenging and need to be surveyed the most intensely, when in fact I'd personally just like to stick a piece of dynamite in the turf and blow them right out of the way.  Instead, I'll be good and take my own advice............ to chill at the bottom of the hill a bit longer and figure out the most productive tactic. 

Got any hills worth fighting over in your life these days??

25 comments:

Gilly said...

Wise words, Dana. I think by now I have decided which hills a worth a fight - well, I should have, shouldn't I, after very nearly 50 years of marriage!! ;)

And what a wonderful view to have at the end of your street - that is enough to cheer anyone up!

awareness said...

Gilly, I remember the first time my friend said those words to me. We were working together on a project/proposal at work. It was time consuming and I was losing focus, and consequently losing the impetus to continue. She redirected my thinking to assess the importance of it and all of a sudden my energy reappeared.
I think I have, for the most part, figured out which hills I'll fight over....every now and then when I know I have too much on my plate (too many demands)I have to remind myself to take a step back and figure it out.
Isn't that an amazing view....and it changes daily with the seasons. :)

Anonymous said...

Dana,
I think I will print this off to remind myself.
I have a hill right now that need to rethink.
Thanks

Mavis

awareness said...

Mavis... its a daily dilemma when you work the front lines eh? :) Knowing how emotionally driven you are (just like me) we need to do this more often than others I think. I guess the other question to ask is.... Why does this matter to me? Bon chance mon amie. x

Independent Chick said...

I have lots of hills...nature of the beast called life. I think now I just have the tools to help me over the hills I need to climb and the smarts to know what hills to just walk around. Still struggling with the sniper hills...not sure what the plan of action should be on those. : )

Great post as always. Love your words.

Reluctant Blogger said...

No, I have none at the moment.

But I have employed that strategy for ages now - picked my battles carefully as I say. And I have begun to recognise more instinctively when it is a battle I need to fight and when it is something I need to walk away from, at least temporarily.

It is a fine line - because no-one wants to feel pushed about or taken for granted but when you can recognise the line it does make life a lot easier.

On a limb with Claudia said...

I hope you have smooth sailing over your hills and mountains. Nothing's worse than seeing a challenge on the horizon. So much anticipation.

((hug))

Barbara aka Layla said...

this is so true....I try not to use much energy on things that just don't matter, and that adds up to quite a few things.

Canuckguy said...

Hmmm, some violent imagery there, then a musical phrase popped into my head that came far away in the dim recesses of my mind, something I heard as a kid and now could only remember the first two lines of this marching song. The rest is Googled
........................
Over hill, over dale
We have hit the dusty trail,
And the Caissons go rolling along.
In and out, hear them shout,
Counter marching and right about,
And those Caissons go rolling along

For it's hi! hi! hee!
In the field artillery,
count out your numbers loud and strong,
And where e'er you go,
You will always know
That the Caissons go rolling along.

In the storm, in the night,
Action left or action right
See those Caissons go rolling along
Limber front, limber rear,
Prepare to mount your cannoneer
And those Caissons go rolling along.

Was it high, was it low,
Where the hell did that one go?
As those Caissons go rolling along
Was it left, was it right,
Now we won't get home tonight
And those Caissons go rolling along.
...........................

So Awareness, good idea to pick your hills, don't wanna do the "Charge of the Light Brigrade", do we.

The Mad Ape said...

Pick your hills? How about pick your poison?

How about concentrating on the Globalists living up on Scum Mountain with their high hogs?

They are about to send the pie-in-the-sky world, that you are so found of, down the toilet and flush it into their cesspool of misery and tyranny, while all the while robbing us of our wealth.

This cabal of evil operates from the local to the national to the international.

I hope you have your rations and your wealth in anything other than the stock market or paper currency.

The sky be a fallin' and Lucy's Diamonds have been analyzed. They are fake and made of glass!

awareness said...

Chickie... maybe those sniper hills are foisted upon us to give us new opportunities to develop more effective tools? Either that or to drive us mental.

Reluctant blogger.... I have learned the hard way to pick my battles too, and try my best to keep tabs on my ego. I think its when I'm caught by surprise and am triggered at the same time that I waver.

Claudia... if the challenge makes sense, I'm all for it, like you are. if it is crazy making bs challenge, then, its a whole different ball game isn't it?

awareness said...

Canuckguy.... What a familiar catchy song! Why am I thinking wickedly dirty words to this song?? Do you know what movie was on tonight?? The Great Escape! One of my favourites.
It's interesting how often we use war related analogies for describing life eh? Thanks for the real words. :)

awareness said...

Hey Mad Ape. After reading your comment? I just want to reach out and hug you. I really do. then, I want to sing........
Let there be peace on Earth and let it begin with you......... xxx

The Mad Ape said...

Awarness here ya go...

The Love Police will set you free.

I will let you hug me anytime. You have a beautiful eye...is it all seeing?

Susan Deborah said...

Mountain, you've got to move Oh! mountain, you've got to move, I speak right now . . .

We sing this in our church.

What a nice analogy!!! Twice removed from originality nevertheless had a whiff of fresh air.

Joy always,
Susan

awareness said...

Mad Apeman.... thank you! for the compliment and the link. I'm chuffed!
That blog has one of the most spiritually moving songs I've ever heard. Alexi Murdoch. I had forgotten about it until this morning, and it hit me exactly the same way it did the first time I heard it last fall. I won't lose sight of it again. I listened to it sitting quietly in my livingroom while enjoying the tranquility of a wintermorning dawning. It was the soundtrack to the view I was enjoying of the snow gently falling on the river valley.
As for my eyes? They change colour.... sometimes they are predominantly green, and sometimes they turn back to the brown I was born with. I prefer them green.
Where are you? In SJ?

awareness said...

oh, and Mad Ape? I will sign up to be the Canadian undercover representative of the Love Police. Great gig that would be!

awareness said...

Susan Deborah.... I want to hear that song! I bet it is one sung with joyful motivating passion.

The Mad Ape said...

I am in Fredericton. Don't know why but I am.

Do you know you?

Also, great responsibility comes from signing up for the Canadian Chapter of the Love Police. Hope that you are up to the challenge!

Step on - Buy a powerful megaphone.

awareness said...

OK, I think I know who you are. :)

Fredericton has many inhabitants who don't know why they landed here.

I will buy two megaphones...one for me and one for crazy man Charles. He's got a whole lotta love in his bark.

Charles LeBlanc said...

The mad Ape is from Fredericton???

Congratulation Irving Blogger!!

You got some info from the guy that I couldn't!!

lol

I wish he would invite me for coffee one of these days? < Just like me and you when we had lunch >

:)

The Mad Ape said...

Charles

Where did you think I was from? If you had read my blog you would have known that.

If you had read the comments I left in your own blog you would have known that.

I have never tried to hide where I was from.

awareness said...

Well, Fredericton is a very very lucky place to have a mad ape, a crazy ADHD man and an irving blogger. It doesn't stand a chance!

Hey Charles, I've signed you up as a Love Police Canadian representative! time to spread the love.......it's all you need you know.

The Mad Ape said...

BTW Charles,

I do not drink coffee, do not smoke cigarettes, do not eat processed food, do not watch mainstream news, do not read newspapers, do not take prescription medication, do not take vaccines, do not pay taxes, do not have a medicare number, do not have a social insurance number, do not do most of what government tells us too, and do not do interviews.

CBC radio asked the same thing of me sometime ago when I wrote a long-winded comment about something I did not agree with.

They wanted to use it on air. FAT chance I told them.

I get around Charles, we have met numerous times.

Charles LeBlanc said...

This is a goody goody Blog.....

Lets not upset the readers..


:P