under the wires

Let's build our dream home under the wires of progress

Nestled beside the highway that leads to success

A grey brick enclave an armlength away

From the next monstrosity blocking the sun everday

____

We'll build our deck on our treeless patch of green

That we share with our neighbours, sight unseen.

Brand new detached, free from all history

Filled with boxstore keepsakes stripped of antiquity.

____

We'll consult with the experts on the colours we choose.

Who knows if the trend is a palette of taupe or blues.

Make sure there's a jacuzzi and a plasma TV

Line the stairway with IKEA artwork to see.

____

Weekday mornings up before the sun awakes

Head to work past the landscaped man made lake

Take the on ramp that leads to the collectors lane

Join the crowd of strangers who must be insane.

____

And slowly our identities will mesh with the rest

As we continue to live in our quaint little nest.

Amongst parents who have no time for their tykes

Who have chosen to live in Branthaven Heights.

There is an alternative to losing our minds

Let's head east down the road to the Maritimes.

Where the homes hold memories of times past and new

And the people have time to ask....How are You?

Let's get in the car and get the hell out of here

Before the next onslaught of pollution floats by us too near

Back to a place where the living is a much better fit

Where the people's sincerity isn't bullshit.

Give me the storied old veranda anyday. I want to hear its tales. I want mine to seep into its floorboards as well, to blend with the others.

talk amongst yourselves........

Last night while driving in the van with my children, the conversation led us to planet Technology. What? You didn't know we had a new planet in our solar system? Well, if you look up into the night sky you will see a set of stars off to the east that form what looks like the map of Japan......well just above that, a little past Uranus, is a flashing red light. That light is actually Planet Technology.......the RED flashing light is pointed at us on planet Earth. And guess what folks? It's beaming subliminal messages at us to plug in, wire up, tune in, and tune out ALL THE TIME.

Can you feeeeeeeellllllllllllllllll it??

The other messages? Buy, replace, toss away...... be in the groove with new, new, new and improved! .......bigger, smaller, better........more gadgets, channels, sounds, actions..........gotta have.....must want......you're a loser if you don't own.........YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT IT!!

gotta have, gotta have, gotta have...........

I find Planet Technology a very strange place and the affects it has on Earth, and I'm beginning to feel like an alien on my own planet. I know I'm definately in the minority now. I can't keep up with the new techie terminology, I can't understand most conversations when two people are chatting it up about the latest game for their playstation whatever......and I completely don't understand the need to have a phone tucked into my pocket so I am accessible at all times.............so I will never be lonely?? I don't get any of it, and besides my cellphone, which is work issued is so archaicly chunky, would never fit into my pocket. It remains in my van for the most part, unjuiced presently.

More shocking (to others more than to me I think) is that I don't really want to get it........except when it relates to the change in human behaviour.

That part of it intrigues AND concerns me.

I once owned a walkman 20 years ago. It held cassettes. I never used it and I never wanted another version. It's not that I don't like music. I LOVE listening to music. I simply prefer it playing on a stereo, on the radio, from my computer, from my family who like to sing around the house. My favourite place to listen to music is when I'm driving. When I go for a walk at lunchtime during the work week I want to take in the sounds of my downtown. Same if I'm on the walking trail down by the river. Same if I'm traipsing through Toronto in the middle of rush hour. I want to hear my own song intertwined with the song of life around me. Maybe if I commuted everyday for long stretches, or if I travelled extensively for work, I would change my mind. I'm sure I would. But, my surroundings don't necessitate this, so it's moot to me personally.

My family all own mp3 - ish gadgets........purchased in the last two years or so. My conversation with my children revolved around the evolution of this technology and how the newest version can hold a gazillion songs because of something called GIGS?? (And to think I thought that was a jamming session with a bunch of musicians) Not only that, you can upload, download, reload (does it wash a load??) movies, music, interviews, concerts.....you can email, take pics, search the internet.......some I think are phones too?? And they are WAY smaller than the versions they have. Needless to say, they were informing me that theirs were obsolete in comparison.

My question to them, said admittedly with sarcastic syrup in my voice................."Why not wait until next Christmas season when ANOTHER version is foisted upon us making this year's version obsolete and relegated to the discount bin by last years bestselling books that were going to evolutionize the planet??" (Remember that HIT book, The Secret?? It made someone a shitload of money all the while passing on common sense packaged in a new age mantra as something evolutionary??)

I also asked...............why would I want to watch a movie on a 2 inch screen? I don't own a plasma TV either to watch the movie like in a theatre either and don't want one......so bigger in this regard is not better in my books.

Where is all this tossed out technology going anyways??

The portion of Planet Technology I really don't feel like I'm missing out on is the ever expanding section of GAMES. I can't even keep them straight in my head, even if I'm trying my best to discuss this stuff with my son. Xboxes, Playstations, Gamecubes, PSPs, Gameboys, DDRs, a Wii, consoles, controllers, interactive whatevers............I learned this morning that the term joystick is NEVER used. Thank God I learned that today, or it would've been VERY embarrassing if I was ever to walk into a GAME convention centre. As much as I try to understand the passion for this stuff and the lingo that goes with it, whenever I walk into one of those stores that carry just gaming paraphenalia, I feel like I have been teleported to Planet Technology without a map.

This is a problem since I have been trying to price Wii's and I don't have a frigging clue what it is I'm pricing or what I need to purchase so that all the parts are there.......... This experience is comparable to shopping for hunting gear. I have no clue about either hobby and I don't want to have a clue.

Though.......I'm interested why some are so interested in this stuff.

And yet....................I'm typing (did I just type the word typing??) on a laptop which I LOVE. I access the internet all the time, which I LOVE........I write on my blog religiously and with much pleasure..........I have a digital camera which goes with me wherever I go. However both pieces of technology are still quite foreign to me as I struggle to understand ALL that I can do with them. And I seem to always be screwing it up. I have yet to figure out how to fix my sidebar on this site without the help of my technologically intuitive family (notice ALL of my links to you people are gone?? I tried to change my template and LOST you all and haven't had a chance to figure out how to put you all back there again......)

My photos? I have so much to learn about how to download them properly and all that. My brother in law took a bunch off my doo-hickey thing in the camera where they are stashed and put them on a CD for me last spring.

Have I done anything with them? Noooooooooo...............

I am a neanderthal is some respects. I guess I'm not a gadget person, though I have some I rely on and love to use. However, you'd never in a million years catch me standing in line overnight waiting to buy the latest game system or music system. Actually, you'd never catch me standing in line over night to buy anything except perhaps front row seats to see Mr. Piano man if it included dinner for two........or at least a chance to invite him over for Thanksgiving. And if THAT happens, I promise I'll ask the person standing in line next to me to text you my news!!

In the meantime........I will be sort of trying to bridge the gap between my techie understanding and the enthusiasm others, including my family, have over some of it.

I don't really want to be completely left behind.

There wont be anyone around to talk to.

All consuming consumerism

I don't get it...............why would anyone in their right mind go shopping on Boxing Day? Sure, there are BIG sales to lure the lemmings back into the malls........we have a recycle box of flyers to prove it. But, you'd think people would have reached their satiation point. Enough already!

I had a tough time this year with all things plastic and blow upity found on the front lawns of tackydom. For some reason, I choked everytime I saw a display of over the top too much garishness blinking messages of materialism. That was a lot of gagging, because it seemed to me a Christmas lighting and ornamental virus hit like wildfire. It used to be that there were one or two off the wall eccentric families in the community who would cover every space and eavestrough on their homes, and then would have this fountain of twinkling lights glaring off their bushes and trees. It was funny..........an ode to the Griswolds. NOW? Whole neighbourhoods have gone blinking bonkers. These same people are lining up for Walmart's Boxing Day bonanza to purchase more zippy lights and blow up thingys for their classy collection. Whooooppeeee.............

This afternoon, I waited inside the mall for 15 minutes to pick up my son and husband at the movie theatre. It was the only reason I would ever set foot in there this week. However, it gave me a chance to gawk and wonder. The place was packed to the rafters with bag carrying sales seekers, looking for yet another great deal..........not to be passed up. Many of them looked like they were really enjoying themselves. What's with that? Maybe I'm in the minority, but I find malls even on a day in March when I would have it all to myself, repulsive. If I have to go in one, it is with a mission that has a beginning and end.......then I'm out of there. No loitering for me. But, I digress..........................these are my thoughts and questions while waiting my 15 minutes, watching the consumer crowds..............boxing it out.........

1. What's with high pointy heels and tight ass jeans complete with a winter jacket with fake fur that only falls just below the breasts? This is Canada people. It's freaking cold outside. Don't tell me this is going to keep you warm? It not only looks uncomfortable and potentially harmful, it seems to be a uniform and not original....... it makes 14 year olds look skanky. It makes 40 year olds look used up. Oh, wait a minute.........................it's the puck bunny uniform. It is truly Canadian................hockey rules!

2. Did every teenager receive a hair straightening device so that they can fakify a look of unique tartism?

3. Why didn't these kid's fathers ever tell them to close their mouths or they'll catch flies like my Dad did? Walking around with a stunned mouth open look is not attractive.........and yet methinks there must be a "how to flirt like a fish" book stuffed in every school locker in the kingdom I've missed reading about? Bone straight hair, dried out and unhealthy looking because of the goop and irons put to it, tight ass jeans, belly jackets and wonky high heels......not blinking............wide black liner eyed...........mouth open pouty like........... arrrrrrgh.........

4. Cell phones. Unbelievable. Are people afraid to be alone even in a mall? What the heck are they afraid to be missing? As people streamed out of the theatres, every other person seemed to be either dialing up, or checking messages, or turning it on. I saw 10 year olds walking by talking on their little flippy compacts. To me, the whole cell phone craze is the epitome of consumerism gone bonkers. I understand the connection to business or the need for a kid to have one if they live in a large city and must commute to school or some situation like that. Safety and business. But, why does a 12 year old need a cell phone to talk to THE 12 year old FRIEND WHO IS WOBBLING ON THEIR SKANKY HIGH HEELS BESIDE THEM?

5. Why are kids allowed to wear such ridiculous get ups, complete with skin stretchy mini skirts and little strappy undershirts, black leggings and pink bras with the straps showing? What message are we giving to these children that dressing like a whore is acceptable.............?? It's beyond me.

6. Why does someone need 25 sweaters? Or every Ninetendo game out there? How come SO many people can afford those game systems? Where does all the plastic go when it has reached it's expiration date? Have we reached our consumerism limit? How much more waste can we generate?

Good thing I was only in the place for 15 minutes. I think my head would have popped off if I had stayed any longer.................