Do Not Go Gently into that Good Night........

Lucy at the beach in PEI, enjoying the summer breezes,

waiting for the Bocci tourney to start

August, 2005

This is the third part of my Lucy story...........her old lady years. Scroll down if you want to start from the beginning..............


Lucy is an April Fool's dog. She'll be 12 grand years in a little over a month, and though this family isn't so loopy that we formally celebrate the birthday of our dog we just may this year, because it will probably be her last. In fact, this time last week, it didn't look like she was going to make it.

As I have mentioned previously, Lucy has always had a loud unlady-like snore........one that can wake the neighbours. Over the past year, she has developed an impressively loud sniffing mechanism too, which sounds like a pot-bellied pig snuffing out truffles. Great for interupting dinner party conversations, I must say. What was more alarming was her wheeziness that reared it's ugly head just before Christmas. It was the first time that we felt that she was in distress. However, after many tests and blood work, we were left in the dark as to what was causing this to happen, except that it seemed to occur after she was out in the cold air or when she got overly excited. Since she is so laid back, this happened for the most part when her family returned home for the evening or when she was greeting visitors.

Last week, her breathing problems worsened. Though the wheezing only ever lasted a short amount of time, it was happening more often. Once again, she made the trip to the Vet's. Now, you would think that because she has received unconditional care and love from the good people at the Vet's Lucy would enjoy her visits there. uh...........no. It freaks her out. But, there was no avoiding it.

My husband took her over around dinner time only to hear some devastating news. There is a good chance that Lucy has lymphoma. She was given a shot of a steroid, and was sent home. When she arrived home, she and her litter buddy solemnly walked through the front door bearing this news. Lucy was struggling with her breathing again too, and for the first time, she was unable to stop the wheezing.

For two hours to no avail, we tried to calm her down hoping to help her turn the corner. All the while, we were trying to figure out whether she was reacting to the steroid injection, or whether her visit to the Vet's prompted the distress and she just couldn't stop herself. Nothing worked. The anxiety level increased. The reality of the situation was not lost on any of us, though we kept holding onto hope that she'd snap out of it. Instead, an emergency visit ensued.

The next hour was heart wrenching and draining, while we first heard news that she wasn't going to make it. As I made arrangements to take a cab over to the hospital with my kids, however, Lucy responded to the next round of medication and calmed down. We had a reprieve, and she came home.

This week, the medication has kept the harsh reality at bay somewhat but in our heart of hearts, her time with us will shortly be over. I will miss all of her eccentricities and her lovable personality. I will miss seeing her take a running slide down the snowy hill on her back like a seal............her enthusiastic trot to the beach, ears flapping, tail wagging.....her ability to warm my feet and heart at the same time........her calming presence and her slow pace walk, imitating E-or, up the street behind her litter buddy and her blonde upstart best friend who still loves to chase tennis balls and who taught her how to bark....her sad eyes and happy disposition, always.

And when I close my eyes and think of her, she will be safely ensconced at the bottom of my son's bed listening to my husband reading Harry Potter aloud at the end of a good day.



Sometimes life just sucks, doesn't it?