Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Hey "Flow." Where Have you Been?

Like most things in life, my job is a paradox. I thrive the best in counselling situations. I love the ebb and flow of the process while having an opportunity to help move an individual forward, even if it's just baby steps. More often than not, counselling offers unending learning opportunities for both myself and the client. What helped me get out of bed in the morning with a bounce in my step was the anticipation of wondering who was going to walk through my door that day and whether or not I would be able to assist them in figuring out their next steps or sorting out the issues they were carrying as a burden on their shoulders.

Career Counselling is really a misnomer, especially with the majority of the clientele I work with. The "career" stuff is the so far down the road for many of them, that really what I provide is personal counselling..........a place to tell their stories. My "office," whether its my real one in a real building or the one I take on the road and into their living rooms, is a place of recognition and acknowledgement. My office provides validation...........my approach has always been to offer guidance on a level playing field. Adult to Adult. God knows, I don't have the answers to their problems. They do. It's up to me to allow them to experience a few "aha" moments and then the confidence to tackle their own demons.........with me on the sidelines coaching them along. This is the ideal.

Lately though, over the course of the past several months, the opportunities to engage in these challenges hasn't been available. The scope in my workworld has narrowed to only include the assessment side of things. I have been spending the majority of my time completing disability applications, meeting with clients, listening to their stories, writing their stories and then pulling together a package to send to a faceless medical board for certification.

This is where the paradox fits in.............

I love the home visits. I love the counselling aspects. I love meeting the families, being on the road, having the freedom, providing a friendly face so that they aren't feeling such a disconnect with government bureaucracy. However, this part of my role is supposed to have been minute. Instead, I have become the "expert" in the office.............and have been swamped with an assessment process that I have completed hundreds of times. As much as I do love the connections and the stories (recognizing that I am often the only one who has sat with this individual and heard their whole tale............it is an honour) In other parts of the province, the Case Managers complete this task. It is part of their role. In fact, I trained them all. In my part of the world, I became the disability assessment queen. It is not a challenge.
Government has their own agendas. Management often builds their agendas around the sitting government.............why not? That's where the money comes from. My job became someone else's agenda and I was dropped from sight. Don't really know why.......but it happened, and I was sinking, feeling no control over my work destiny. I had started to put the "feelers" out again. I was not going to rot sitting in my office pouring over paperwork when I have the desire to apply my skills, reach out and do what I do best.
When the spring in my step left me once again recently and my energy and drive tanked, I knew I was in the right frame of mind to move forward.
Then.................a new gig landed lightly on my desk............one that comes with a blank slate......one that I can mould and shape (if I get to it before anyone else with an agenda does) to fit my interests and expertise. It'll include more outreach, intervention with families and children, counselling, teaching, coaching and coordinating with community service providers. It's right up my alley. It's where I'll be able to find my flow again. In a matter of minutes of officially finding out about the plans (albeit sketchy) for my new gig, my energy level returned...............along with an e-mail from the person who originally hired me 15 years ago, who is now the Great White Hope Director guy..............that I was needed.
I look forward to finding my flow again. I look forward to setting my own agenda again. I look forward to delving into my job with the gusto that has been missing for a long long time.
Happy dance..............happy dance!

1 comment:

Ellen said...

There's nothing better than doing that "flow jig"... it validates that you are on the right course. How very nice for you! Sometimes I get lost in daily trenches and forget what it's like to feel truly happy about what I'm doing... it's nice to see when others make it out.

Stop by the garden if you get a chance. A right-winger left a comment I'd like you to read.